When I first moved into my apartment, all my belongings fit into eight boxes. “Sorry I have so much stuff!” I yelled at friends while running up and down the stairs. My friends were confused, trying to figure out why I needed five people to help me move. Coming off a year and a half of living with a roommate, I had kept my personal belongings to a minimum. My old shopping addiction had been semi-sorted out and I was trying not to go back. But old ways have a way of returning when you least expect it. That’s what I realized after living in the same apartment for four years.
After deciding to renew my lease for another year, I decided some organizing and redecorating may be in order to keep my place looking fresh. While looking for inspiration, I came across the Mins Game. It seems easy enough to play and you end up eliminating 465 items out of your home, by donating as many items to to corespond with the day of the game. It sounds daunting but seeing how the average house in America has over 300,000 items in it, that’s hardly a drop in the bucket. Sure, my home isn’t huge by any standards but it could still have a ton of crap in it. So I decided to play for the month of November. And as I write this on the last day, I’ve successfully completed it! (Thanks competitive nature.)
So, what did I learn?
My House Was Aggravating My Mental Health
Now that I’ve been on a proper treatment plan for my mental health, I know that I don’t suffer from anxiety or depression. Instead, these are symptoms of a mood disorder and ADHD, which I’m now being properly treated for. It’s been such a relief to have the right team in place. In a lot of ways, 2018 was a growing year and taking responsibility for me. In taking responsibility, I will admit to the world I am not the greatest housekeeper.
Being chronically ill with several autoimmune issues, you have to be picky where your energy goes. My energy goes towards my career so as a trade-off, my house suffers. Since I just live with my number one man aka my cat, I usually get away with it. But this year? The common breaking point for meltdowns has been my house. Sure, there were underlying issues, but the state of my home is what would do me in. I can count at least three people I cried to about my house.
Since September, I’ve done a pretty good job of keeping up on my apartment. But decluttering for the past month has really made me have an appreciation of clean counters, dusted bookshelves and a place for things.
I Fed Into the Ideal Version Of Me
The ideal version of your is something I’ve seen on a few self-development blogs but I didn’t realize I was participating in it until this past month. If you haven’t heard of the concept before, it’s pretty simple. You have an imaginary ideal version of yourself and you buy into it by purchasing items you don’t need because one day you will. The ideal version of yourself is usually someone who you aspire to become but may not necessarily even want to. For example, Ideal Athena is going to eat kale chips so she buys a food dehydrator. Current Athena hates kale so she will never even use the dehydrator in the first place. But ideal Athena will, one day, so I’m going to buy it. Pretty silly, right?
Yet, here I was, getting things for the ideal me. Ideal me has a few shelves of books she’s going to read one day. She’s also going to be really into doing her hair., wears scarves as statement pieces and wedges. And because one day ideal me will eventually be here, I’m going to hold on to all this shit.
I think it’s funny, for myself at least, how I imagine physical items are going to magically transform me, without me having to do any of work to transform. That’s why diet pills and stuff like It Works wraps are so hot. People don’t want to do the work. It’s hard. We’re tired. We’re scared. Or in my case, I don’t really want to do it but I still think I should. And I’ve spent money. So why not save it? I’ll get there some day, right?
I Buy Stuff Just Buy Stuff
When I was younger, I had a shopping problem. It was nothing for me to go on spending sprees when I wasn’t properly medicated for my mood disorder. Instead of dealing with my emotions, I ran from one codependent relationship to another. And when those relationships failed me, I partied and shopped. I remember dancing at a club on the strip with DJ AM playing the hits while drinking a Malibu & Pineapple. Dealing with life was for losers.
I was obsessed with buying designer names, collecting items, anything I could do to make myself feel better about, well, myself. I got high off shopping. And when the high went away, I was trying to figure out what other destructive things I could do to distract myself. Needless to say, getting involved in the PF community, therapy and meds have helped tremendously. But I’m still human and old habits die hard. And a lot of the shit I’ve thrown away is a result of it.
While on a work trip, I caught myself falling into this bad habit again. I love souvenirs as I feel they are a way to enjoy your trip a little bit longer. I love them for myself and I love to give them to others. But on the last day of my trip, I was going hard at a museum. Maybe I should get a patch, I told myself. No, jewelry! I need this book! OMG, this print! I grabbed everything in my arms and walked around, looking for the next thing I could buy to remember this day just a bit longer.
Luckily, I caught myself before I had spent a hundred plus dollars shopping on stuff I was just going to get rid of anyways. I was exhausted from traveling and my coping mechanism of shopping was just trying to get me through the day.
I Will Be Playing The Mins Game Again
For the month of December, I will be doing another round of the MinsGame. I’ve only made it through part of my living room and kitchen, which leaves so much of my apartment left to declutter and organize. I want every spot in my home to be a place that serves a purpose, makes me happy and rejuvenates me. It’s important now for me to be organized and comfortable and I feel my home is the best place to start. 33, new me, right?
Tell me. Have you ever played the Mins Game? Do you declutter? Has your stuff left you feeling down? And if you’re a minimalist, do you have any tips for me?